It's 12:30am and I couldn't sleep cuz I was crying. It's not that I don't wanna go home but I don't wanna leave either. I'm so grateful I was able to have this experience. I'm thankful for everyone who put up with and/or helped me. I'm not even upset at the ppl who wronged me. All I know is that in 2 weeks it'll all be over and I'll be sitting in a room wondering if I was really on the other side of the world. I know it won't seem real, it will always seem like a dream. Not in the sense that everythihng is perfect here but just the thought that I would have the opportunity to live in Korea for 5 months and that it actually happened is unbelievable. I still have 7 more days of class but already I'm crying thinking that I'll prolly never see my kids again. It's also strange to think that even if I could put my feelings into words I can't tell any of my teachers how I feel lol. I still have strong classroom jealousy and wish my teachers woulda spent more time with me, but I understand why and wouldn't trade my school with even the nicest ones I've seen.
The vice principal sits facing all the teachers in the teacher's room. I still think I see amusement in his eye everyday when I say hello in Korean. I appreciate that he attempted conversations with me those two times he brought me home, even though it puts him at a vulnerable position. I know he genuinly worries about me especially when it started to get cold. Even without words I felt his fatherly care.
I can't help but smile when I think of the 1st grade teacher. He was everyone's grandpa. I'll miss seeing him play and joke with the kids, or help them finish the last of their lunches. I admire that the kids love him but he was also not afraid to punish them. He also treated me like a granddaughter without babying me. I looked forward to seeing him because he almost always spoke to me even if it was in Korean and we both knew I didn't understand. He made me smile everyday especially when he started yelling at me for not speaking Korean.
Tim's mom and the office administrator was so bubblely and smiley. I don't know how she handles the energy her boys have but they are all so sweet when they calm down. (and super smart!). I can't wait to see what they become...if i ever get to.
I'll miss the "oh, you made it here again, good to see you" looks from the 2nd grade teacher. I'll miss seeing the 1st graders trying not to be seen rushing through the halls with their hands folded behind their backs. I'll miss not hearing "victoria teacher" 500 times a day. I'll miss walking into my classroom never having a clue what i'll find or who will pop out from under tables, or out of cabinets LOL. I'll miss the school wide tag/hide and go seek games. I'll miss seeing Mary and Peach's matching outfits and the pretty lil Sopia and Isabel who look like twins but everyone swears they're not related.
I'll most def miss the lunch lady, she always so happy to see me and cooks such wonderful things. The school nurse too both take care of me the best they can, always shovig extra food at me! And everyone who knows me knows that's the easiest way to make me happy.
There's just so much that I feel like I'm leaving. I know no one will really miss me, there will always be another English teacher, another foreigner in the strange building or at the bus stop but it doesn't bother me. I'm just glad that Korea opened it's doors to me. The TaLK program was to better educate the Korean people but I feel like I've learned so much more than I taught anyone. I can't believe I'm gettin paid for this! I'm just so grateful.
I was excited to come, happy to stay and sad to leave.
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